Dr. Jonathan Brower Ph.D. is a psychotherapist who specializes in anxiety and depression. With his own practice located in Westlake Village, California, he is well-equipped to talk about depression, and what can cause it.
A woman whose husband had died had depression symptoms for several months. Over time, her depression lifted. It was more of loss, a tremendous sadness which took energy from her, but it wasn’t the type of depression I am talking about here. People can use the word “depression” in many ways, and it can have some validity, but that is different than the type of depression we are talking about.
Frequently, when it is cloudy and overcast, people tend to say, “This weather is depressing.” But the climate is not depressing; it is just what it is. People may believe they get depressed because of the weather. But the reality is they externalize their depression onto someone or something else. The weather is not the cause of their depression, but the weather is linked to some other event which is causing the depression.
I know of a man who lived in a old climate. During the winter, there was not much sunlight. He was convinced that the weather was what depressed him. But clearly, what was involved in his depression was something else. In his family were his two impaired parents who had their own tremendous attachment bond ruptures that were not repaired. The family was very cold, very dark. There was a huge void of emotional light and warmth in this family
When this man’s therapy was completed, he finally realized the weather was not depressing him, but the emotional temperature in his house was. It was linked to his parents being dark, depressed anxious human beings who did not want the light of happiness in their family.
The bottom line is that depression, more often than not, is a way to de-energize one’s retaliatory rage which came about when important caretakers — usually, but not always, parents — have caused a significant attachment bond rupture that did not get repaired. The child has loving feelings toward the hurtful parent mixed with his rage toward the parent. Now the child must punish himself for the unconscious retaliatory fantasies inside his psyche.
The information in the article is not intended to substitute for the medical expertise and advice of your healthcare provider. We encourage you to discuss any decisions about treatment or care with an appropriate healthcare provider.
