Lots of two-year-olds show their emotions by hitting. Nancy Kahn Scott, owner/operator of the My Gym Children’s Fitness Center in Palm Desert, California, gives her tips to parents on how to deal with this often upsetting behavior.
It’s every parent’s worst nightmare – you walk into a birthday party, playground or child’s gym and your normally well-behaved little angel starts hitting another child who grabs his toy truck. The other parents give you the evil eye and you want to disappear into the ground, never to be seen again. What to do?
The first thing to remember is although we are often reluctant to admit it, hitting is not really abnormal behavior among the two-year-old set. While they may know in their heart of hearts that caring and sharing is the way to go, the instant reaction they get when they hit another child – from that child and from other adults – is sometimes too hard to resist.
So if you come to a My Gym ready for a fun-filled afternoon with your little cherub, and within five minutes he starts pummeling another kid, what can you do? We recommend the following:
- A quiet explanation above sharing should be given over and over. On the way into the facility, remind your child that “we share and use gentle hands.” Anticipate your child’s frustration and get involved before an incident occurs.
- Stay close so your child does not hurt another child. If the child actually hits another child, apologize and show genuine concern for the other child. Then remove your child from the immediate play area.
- Taking him off to the side and quietly discussing the event can be helpful. Use words such as “gentle hands. We share. Be a kind friend.” If the child is verbal, ask him to tell you about what happened and suggest another option.
- Model the appropriate behavior yourself while playing closely with your toddler and his friends. Let them learn by example, not only from your words. Talk as you play so your child knows what is expected – and what isn’t.
Hitting is something that usually dissipates when a child reaches a certain age, and many kids go through it - even though their mothers and fathers may deny it! If it happens to you, take action and just hope that this time your little one will learn from your actions, and that this unpleasant behavior will, in time, subside and eventually disappear.
The information in the article is not intended to substitute for the medical expertise and advice of your healthcare provider. We encourage you to discuss any decisions about treatment or care with an appropriate healthcare provider.
